I'm overwhelmed by your love
You're amazing love for me.
I will never understand
Why you chose to be my friend.
Oh I, I will not forget the price you paid
Of love on Calvary.
Amazing love, Amazing grace,
I am overwhelmed With gratitude and praise. I will rejoice,
Fall on my knees,
Lift up my voice,
A love song I will sing.
A serenade of sweet worship to you
My King.


♥♥♥

I found God on the corner of 1st and Amistad
Where the West was all but won
All alone, smoking his last cigarette
I said, "Where've you been?" He said, "Ask anything."

Where were you, when everything was falling apart?
All my days were spent by the telephone that never rang
And all I needed was a call that never came
To the corner of 1st and Amistad

Lost and insecure, you found me, you found me
Lying on the floor, surrounded, surrounded
Why'd you have to wait? Where were you? Where were you?
Just a little late, you found me, you found me.

These words from The Fray's 'You Found Me' seem to be echoing in the hearts of literally millions of people. Does the song express your heart as well? Haven't you had things 'fall apart' on one level or another?

It's the tension we feel when we're caught in between the way things are and the way things should be. It's an emotional strain and drain that causes us to simultaneously remember that God is good - but also ask why our lives are not.

Like the home life that is supposed to be peaceful and renewing, yet is filled with the soundtrack of angry words and painful exchanges. Or perhaps even worse...is deafened by silence and disappointed glances.

Like the relationship that started so amazingly well, yet ended with a callous and cowardly text or message on Facebook and left you feeling as valuable as the garbage you took out the week before.

Like the loss of a friend. Like the disappointment in circumstances. Like the million other things that make us cry out to God and ask:

'Where were You?'

I think I know how you feel. And I definitely know of a man who lived thousands of years ago who lost more and experienced more pain than perhaps anyone else who walked this earth. His name was Job, and just when his life was going as well as any life could go, here's what happened:

Sometime later, while Job's children were having one of their parties at the home of the oldest son, a messenger came to Job and said, "The oxen were plowing and the donkeys grazing in the field next to us when Sabeans attacked. They stole the animals and killed the field hands. I'm the only one to get out alive and tell you what happened."

While he was still talking, another messenger arrived and said, "Bolts of lightning struck the sheep and the shepherds and fried them-burned them to a crisp. I'm the only one to get out alive and tell you what happened."

While he was still talking, another messenger arrived and said, "Chaldeans coming from three directions raided the camels and massacred the camel drivers. I'm the only one to get out alive and tell you what happened."

While he was still talking, another messenger arrived and said, "Your children were having a party at the home of the oldest brother when a tornado swept in off the desert and struck the house. It collapsed on the young people and they died. I'm the only one to get out alive and tell you what happened." (Job 1:13-19)

Can you possibly imagine this scene? In the space of a few dozen heartbeats, Job lost everything that was near and dear to his heart. All possessions and family cruelly ripped from his life in a matter of minutes.

Think Job might have been asking God where He was at this point? Think Job might have been able to pen some lyrics of doubt and expressions of pain?
And yet, here is the song that came from the pieces of his shattered heart:

"I came naked from my mother's womb,
and I will be naked when I leave.
The Lord gave me what I had,
and the Lord has taken it away.
Praise the name of the Lord!" (Job 1:21-22)

In all of this, Job did not sin by blaming God.

Was Job some super saint that didn't feel pain or could just blow it off? Not at all. He was human just as much as you or me, but the difference is he didn't have a human perspective. Rather than focus on the sting of things falling apart, he trusted in the power of the God who holds everything together. He worshipped God with tears and resisted the temptation to blame the evils of this world on the Creator of the universe.

And what you should know is that God has it all under control. You may feel like He wasn't there in a difficult time but the reality is He was closer than you ever imagined. He doesn't need to find you because He never let you go in the first place. That's why we have these promises that are like the mast of a ship that we cling to during the storms of life:

Listen to the Lord who created you.
O Israel, the one who formed you says,
"Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you.
I have called you by name; you are mine.
When you go through deep waters,
I will be with you.
When you go through rivers of difficulty,
you will not drown.
When you walk through the fire of oppression,
you will not be burned up;
the flames will not consume you (Isa 43:1-2).

I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world (John 16:33).

For he who avenges murder cares for the helpless. He does not ignore the cries of those who suffer (Psalm 9:12).

I will never fail you. I will never abandon you (Hebrews 13:5).

Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD (Psalm 27:14).

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose (Romans 8:28).

In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials (1 Peter 1:6).

May these truths find you in the midst of your trials.

Let me tell you about the changes that have been going on in my life in the past two months I haven't really been blogging.

1) I got a bunny for Easter. His name is Smoocher. And he's a spoiled boy.
2) Speaking of Easter, I had a great one. I spent it with Brandon and his family.
3)Speaking of Brandon, he's now my boyfriend. As of April 5th, 2009.
4)Speaking of April, I started my second year of Bible college April 6th and it's going phenominally.
5)Speaking of phenominal, I opened up service on Wednesday night, and all I prayed was that the Lord give me exactly what to say, nothing more and nothing less. And He did. And it was phenominal.
6) I got a job at Ruby Tuesday. And believing for this second job at the pediatrics office.
7) I wrote a song for my mom for mother's day. It's beautiful.
8) I've now written a total of 17 articles for the magazine I work for and none of them have actually been published. But that's soon too!
9) All of the articles I have written have been sent back to me with such postive feedback I cry almost everytime reading the nice things my editor says about my writings.
10) Dat mommy is gonna be having twins soon! Sooo excited.

I think that's all for now. Mainly because that's all I can think of. But at least now we're all on the same page. Haha. Life has been so wonderful. My God is sooo good to me, even though I dont deserve it. I walk in blessings, and Im gonna continue to walk in them.

Today I decided to read the book of of Jonah out of humor. My biggest fear in life is whales, and being eaten by a whale. But in reading, I was amazed at the difference between God and Jonah (as though I should need a reminder that God is different from humans). I’m not sure that Jonah ever redeems himself throughout the four chapters of this short book.

Certainly, there are glimpses of a man who gets it and is ready to move in the right direction, but his heart never seems to settle in who God is or how he moves throughout history. God tells him to do something, he runs away, he turns back, he obeys, and then he gets mad when he doesn’t like the results. Here is a man that should be rejoicing that the fruit of his labor is the transformation of a wicked society, but instead he sits in disgust that God would choose to show compassion. “But to Jonah this seemed very wrong and he became angry… ‘I knew that you are a gracious and compassionate God, slow to anger and abounding in love, a God who relents from sending calamity’.” (Jonah 4:1-2)

I love that the book ends with God scolding him. There is no resolution to the story. God sends him to his room to think about what he has done but never tells him its time to come back out.

Unfortunately, I can’t help but see a bit of myself in Jonah. God tells me to do something, I run away, I turn back, I obey, and then I get mad when I don’t like the results. I think the key to breaking this pattern is found in my intimacy with God. Intimacy with God comes about when I have a detailed knowledge and understanding of God’s heart and activity that comes from pursuing Him as my greatest treasure. This isn’t head knowledge alone, but is instead a knowledge that comes when I immerse my whole self – mind, heart, soul – in the object of my delight. Henry Scougal once wrote that “…the worth and excellency of a soul is to be measured by the object of its love.” Jonah certainly had a knowledge of how God’s heart works and moves but he never allowed it to enrapture him and take control of his own life.

You see, when true intimacy with God is developed in me there is no reason to run away in the first place. When true intimacy with God is developed in me there is no reason to question the results because I trust wholly in the “object of [my] love”.

“You, God, are my God, earnestly I seek you; I thirst for you, my whole being longs for you, in a dry and parched land where there is no water. I have seen you in the sanctuary and beheld your power and your glory. Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you. I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands. I will be fully satisfied as with the richest of foods; with singing lips my mouth will praise you. On my bed I remember you; I think of you through the watches of the night. Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings. I cling to you; your right hand upholds me.” (Psalm 63:1-8)

Ich Liebe Dich

Recently, more than ever, God's been pulling and tugging and twisting on my heart about Africa. I know that I am called to go there and reach people. Specifically, I know I am called to the countries of Uganda and Zimbabwe. The Lord has given me vision after vision of the orphange I'm to fund over there. My heart breaks constantly for the people living in extreme poverty and diseases, most of which we have cures for. I've heard many a people talk about being called as a missionary to Africa. I do not believe I'm called to be a missionary to Africa. I do, however believe I am called to do work over there. I was looking back on a prophecy that was spoken over my life less than a year ago by a pastor/evangelist I greatly admire. The Lord spoke through him and to me said "You are called to be a great prophetess to the nations. You will travel the world and see millions of people saved and set free by the work of the Lord through you. Get ready, your time is coming." I read this and emotions run crazy through my head. Excitement, fear, & anxiety among many others. I have done so much research on Africa and the enclosed countries. One of the books I read during my research was called Red Letters by Tom Davis, which actually, is the reason for this blog.

In one way, Red Letters is about the Church and it's response to global issues (especially issues that are destroying the continent of Africa) such as HIV/AIDS, poverty, and desperation. The book begins with an open apology from the Church to the almost fifty-million people living in the world today with HIV/AIDS for not having acted sooner. As soon as I read that, I knew this book had captivated me.

In another way, Red Letters is about individuals living in extreme poverty, sickness, and destitution. Tom Davis brings to life vivid recollections and stories of children who find themselves alone (because both of their parents have died from HIV/AIDS), infected with HIV/AIDS, and in situations where selling themselves for sex is the only way to get food for the next week.

The concept of the book deals with the words of Christ and what it would look like if the Church, God's people and chosen instrument to bring the Truth of the Gospel to every man, woman, and child, lived out the words of Christ and lived lives of faith that bleed for the sake of others.

I know that I desperately want to be part of the solution. Often, we don't get involved because it seems so overwhelming. Tom Davis suggests getting involved with something called 5 for 50 to be part of the solution for helping and restoring the almost fifty million people with HIV/AIDS. Davis lays out the 5 steps and they are:

1. Give 5 minutes a day to pray for those suffering from HIV/AIDS
2. Give 5 hours a week to fast for those suffering from HIV/AIDS
3. Give 5 dollars a month to the 5 for 50 Fund to support worthy causes
4. Give 5 days a year to travel overseas to help alleviate poverty and suffering
5. Give 5 people an opportunity to join you on your journey

They are simple steps, but powerful. I love that the emphasis is on giving. Each of those steps requires me to give sacrificially.

Here are some statistics I also came accross in my research:
- 5,500 Africans die each day from preventable and treatable diseases
- 640,000 children under age 15 were newly infected with HIV in 2006, bringing the total number of children living with HIV to 2.2 million
- 28 million children die each year from curable diseases
- 17 million children die each year from malnutrition and starvation
- 33% of the world's population is malnourished
- 20% of the world's population has no access to safe water
- 10 million children are involved in the sex industry
- 100 million children live on the streets
- 200 million children are considered child laborers

Matthew 25:31-40 says:
"When he finally arrives, blazing in beauty and all his angels with him, the Son of Man will take his place on his glorious throne. Then all the nations will be arranged before him and he will sort the people out, much as a shepherd sorts out sheep and goats, putting sheep to his right and goats to his left.
"Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Enter, you who are blessed by my Father! Take what's coming to you in this kingdom. It's been ready for you since the world's foundation. And here's why:

I was hungry and you fed me,
I was thirsty and you gave me a drink,
I was homeless and you gave me a room,
I was shivering and you gave me clothes,
I was sick and you stopped to visit,
I was in prison and you came to me.'

"Then those 'sheep' are going to say, 'Master, what are you talking about? When did we ever see you hungry and feed you, thirsty and give you a drink? And when did we ever see you sick or in prison and come to you?' Then the King will say, 'I'm telling the solemn truth: Whenever you did one of these things to someone overlooked or ignored, that was me—you did it to me.'


I've got to do something.

So my posts are a little backed up and I'm having to post two in one day. But this post is actually thursdays post. I've been reading in the Old Testament alot lately, I know, crazy. I think God enjoys having us do things we don't like to do. God has a sense of humor, I know it.

So, I finished the book of Zechariah this morning. There is one verse that especially grabbed my attention today. God is speaking through Zechariah about the way that He will restore and bless Jerusalem. He says that the streets will be filled with life again - elderly men and women hobbling with their canes and children running and screaming for no reason at all. There would be joy again and what a wonderful thought that must have been for God's people. How the people must have wondered at the greatness of God and his ability to restore them in the way that only He can.

And then, God says this: It may seem marvelous to the remnant of this people at that time, but will it seem marvelous to me? (Zechariah 8:6) The future God paints for these people is spectacular and beautiful, but to Him it doesn't even scratch the surface of His grandeur. He is capable of so much more.

I think of the times I, as a little girl, marveled at my father's strength and abilities. Let's be honest, I thought he was the greatest thing on earth. He'd push the power button on the remote control and I'd act like he was a magician; He'd pick up a bag of groceries I struggled to move and suddenly he was super-human. But while it was great for his ego, I know the truth. I was marveling at things that are easy for him.

God makes sure that His people know that bringing joy and restoration is easy for Him. Though what flows from His hand and heart seems marvelous to us, He is capable of so much more. My life is a story of God's faithfulness. I have seen Him move in mighty, tremendous, and miraculous ways. But somehow, there is so much more to Him that I don't even comprehend. He is more good, more powerful, more splendid than I will ever know.

I'm sad to say it, but there came a day when I was disappointed in the strength of my father. I grew up and realied one day that there is no magic in turning on the TV and I carried in the groceries for myself. But now I proclaim not the wonders of my dad, but the wonders of my King. I join my parents and all God's people and proclaim "Great is our Lord and mighty in power!" (Psalm 147:5)

Today I spent time reading in Ezra, which to me, didn't start off to be too exciting. But I love this description of Ezra in chapter 7:


...the gracious hand of his God was on him. For Ezra had devoted himself to the study and observance of the Law of the Lord, and to teaching its decrees and laws in Israel. (Ezra 7:9-10)

In reading this morning I was especially struck by the way God is shown to move in the hearts of men and women. God moved in the heart of a pagan king and God moved in the hearts of His own people to accomplish His great and perfect will for their lives.

I know that God has been moving in my heart recently. He has been birthing dreams and desires that can only come from Him - dreams that point toward the moving of His heart in my life, in the life of my family, and the life of my community.

At times, I'm scared to move forward and I'm nervous about the outcome. But - like Ezra - I've experienced the gracious hand of God that is ever present as we pursue him with everything we have, everything we are, and everything we ever hope to be.


Because the hand of the Lord my God was on me, I took courage and gathered leaders from Israel to go up with me. (Ezra 7:28)


God move in our hearts. And when you move, give us the courage to follow. And as we follow, glorify your Name.

Name:Alayna Michelle.
You can bake me a cake on: December 29th.
College: New Way International Bible College.
Email: youth@newwaychristianfellowship.com

Friends
Family
New Way Revival Center
Mrs. Kimmy and Pastuh.
My littles.
Purses.
Shoes.
Clint Brown "Nothin But Church" CD.
Relentless Youth Ministry.
Preaching.
Youth Trips.
Ballet.
Dancing.
Singing.
Facebook.
My bestie.

A pair of Jimmy Choo's
My new SUV.
My new apartment/house.

Pastor
Kayla
De'Langelo
Unbound Ministry
Trayvor

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